2020 - The Hope!

Here it is - the much awaited New Year 2020!

I said 'much awaited' because the Year 2019 had been the toughest year for me and my family with serial of events happening, which I hope shouldn't happen to anyone.

The 2019 New Year Eve shall remain the darkest day yet. It was on this day last year that we had to accept the true reality of life - the impermanence. Waking up to a phone call, I couldn't come to terms with what had happened. I wished I was simply going through a bad dream. An unplanned journey in a packed taxi, yet so lonely and dry. Never expected the New Year to unfurl in that manner even in my wildest thoughts. Every time I visit Thimphu, I purposely avoid the sight of Lungtenzampa MSS, in particular the basketball court. Our final approach to that ground was heartbreaking and the sight of a tent 'housing' him was unbearable. It still kills me to the core to recollect the scene of my beloved brother lying lifeless! The pain that I endured by the  s…

A Spring of Hope

Back again! Yeah, to this blog. After repeated failed attempts to revive blogging, I am once again giving it a try. Perhaps, the one last time! I have always wanted to write, write and write something, because of which I have created this blog in the first place. But you know this writer's block? That's right, I am plagued by this block. Quite often I tend to have "brilliant" ideas running in my head and bubbling inside, but moment I reach out for pen and paper, I would be stuck with one sentence, not able to make an inch forward! At times, I write whole lot only to be discarded in the last minute. This time though, I have come back with a determination to continue writing something, at least something to keep my blog alive even if it's not worth reading! The idea is that eventually I might be able to come up with a worthwhile read, may be it would take a very long time, but I have made a start. That I believe is important.

Lets keep the fingers crossed! 


Where are you my Mr. Confidence?!

I want to say "I'm great, thanks!" every time anybody greets me or asks me either seriously or casually without meaning much, as is the case most often. But I can't say it cause doing so makes me feel guilty of not being truthful, although they won't know my reality or even care to know. So, "Hmm, I'm OK!" is normally my response.

I know I am not doing great. Nothing is going as good as I wanted. Not that I have too many wants or too big of wants. Even the simpler wants don't seem to be falling into my way. The situation worsens by the each passing day as I helplessly gaze myself spiralling into the deepest level of hopelessness. Seeing me in such a bad shape, some of my mates would out of deep concern ask me "where is the positivity that you used to always exude?" My guess is just as good as theirs.

That feeling of hopelessness creeps in every now and then, almost paralysing my academic pursuit forward. It is so frustrating but in the…

“The Imitation Game” --The Power of Mathematics

That was it; my brain wouldn’t register anything anymore, thanks to the terrible insomnia I suffered the night before. With terrible headache and blinding dizziness, the last place I wanted to be in was at the monotonous three-hour each English and computing classes! Yeah, you know what I meant? Elementary and obvious stuff-word document, excel, power point etc. All I wanted was to just go home and launch straight into the bed, so badly. But I couldn’t. My friends had a plan-the plan to go watch movie. “Come on, you should come, it will be fun”, says everyone, almost dragging me on.
Yeah, why not, being a nice (obedient? :) ) friend that I am, I hopped into the Bus to the Randwick city. My friends are a good mix of Cambodian, Nepalese, Bangladeshi, Mongolian, Indonesian and Fijian. The good thing about our group is that there is only one from each country, meaning we don’t have to deal with people conversing in their own language. The only complain if I may call is the disagreement tha…

But WHY? Why and why?

I've been scanned, literally, through to a lot of 'whys' and still I've yet to be over with 'why'. Almost everybody that I bump into there I get that anticipated ‘why’ flying rather instantly. My friends normally dub me mostly affectionately than matter-of-factly as a positive person, but I am quite doubtful as to how long I can stay positive if these ‘whys’ keep flowing! I don't blame anybody else for that matter since throwing those sorts of question keep me checked! But some times it gets tiring to hear over and over again to the extent that it begins to even sound offensive! Nevertheless, as the time passes by I bounce back to normal. Good thing about all these is that it gave me and continues to give me opportunity to reflect upon my course of actions hence leading to a newer and more importantly better perspective.
It was in year 2007 that I got an opportunity to study mathematics in the United States under the auspices of Fulbright scholarship. Why m…

A Bad Feeling! - Part III

A Bad Feeling! Part-II