Being responsible…

If you are not responsible for your mistake, who is?

A couple of weeks back I played the game of soccer. It was Physics vs. Mathematics group of PgDE ‘B’. Normally, we prefer playing in the morning due to extreme heat in the daytime. I would be up by 5 AM sharp without complain, all because of a great love for the game. If I were to rate myself in a scale of 10, I would give not more than 5; I am just an average player but that doesn’t deter me at all.

Me at the extreme right: Team Tri-Sci (PgDE 'B' B) vs. BEd. IV Yr

But that time, though, it was already 5:30 AM when I woke up. Within no time, I reached out and woke the teammates up and made our way to the playfield. But to our utter disappointment, the B.Ed students-ten of them playing Futsal-had occupied the playfield. I blamed the teammates for being late and that was what we get being late. I didn’t want to give up after waking up that early. And I didn’t want to negotiate with the B.Ed students either.

Some of our friends negotiated rather peacefully and succeeded in driving those Futsal players away. It didn’t take much time to get our game started. The game gained its momentum and everybody played at the optimum level. Just a few minutes before half time, it was 2-1 in favor of Physics team. Entrusted with a left-winger’s role, I tried to live up to the expectation of every team member. I was feeling comfortable with my teammates and in fact I loved the way they encouraged me to play harder with confidence. Yes, I lacked confidence and stamina! It seemed like everything was coming along my way when I made few long and short successful passes. I even took charge to take a corner kick for the first time in my life. Being a left-winger my mates asked me to kick it totally oblivious to my skills. But miraculously I delivered a fine ball that connected to a goal by our little-overweight striker-Zambala, giving us an equalizer 2-2. Excitement filled the ground, but it was short lived-a talented Physics striker found a net in our post. Now it was 3-2, the Physics in the lead. Nevertheless, we made the last minute pressure on them and we were presented with a very wonderful opportunity to deliver a perfect much-needed equalizer. Our right-winger struck the ball so hard just a few yards away but it deviated from their goalie and went rolling right to our striker only to be missed and I saw the ball making its way towards me. I was alone just a yard away! With just one thought in mind (a goal), I kicked the ball so hard that it went flying away from the post. I had just missed the lifetime opportunity! I felt terrible about the miss. Not surprisingly, everybody shouted at me and some even went to the extent of saying me to ‘stop playing’ if I were to miss such opportunity. In the midst of frustration, I just shouted back ‘F**K U’…!  

Being a human myself bound with full of tendencies, I didn’t want to take this blame singlehandedly and so I blamed our striker Zambala. I made my point that it was his ball and that I was not at all in the position to kick that ball, it appeared out of nowhere, and that I happened to kick it. However, deep down inside me, I knew I made a biggest mistake by kicking that hard. I could have kicked lightly and aimed at the side, which provided more probability for a goal. My teammates would not have to curse me for losing bets-a lunch to the Physics team. I felt so sorry for teammates and like they said, I wanted to quit playing soccer. I thought it was just a subject of humiliation and lost of energy. The final whistle blew and immediately boots on my hands, I made my way straight to the hostel. I began to hate soccer!

Back in the room, the same thought accompanied me. Whole time I was like ‘Pema, you suck at everything!’ I began to hate myself.

But as if a divine has intervened, I came to realize that the problem was not with the soccer or teammates, it was solely with me. I didn’t want to accept my mistake; that was a problem, which made me miserable! Had a taken that mistake as a stepping-stone, I wouldn’t have felt that way. After all, I am human just like any other prone to mistakes! Instead, I had just wanted to escape and not confront with it. I was a loser! Had I been able to realize that I made that mistake and that there was still ample of room for improvement, there should not have been any reasons to feel the way I felt. I had never taken my friends suggested seriously and because of that I was still on the same level while my friends showed much improvement and seemed happier.

I have now come to realize that if you refuse to accept your mistake, then you refuse to improve as well! 

In the name of L O V E...

I kind of knew this was coming when you first cornered me into a tough spot! Yet, I didn’t have enough guts to stand firm with my beliefs. I gave in, rather easily, and now here I am, a completely frail and dejected man. I don’t really love the way you lied!

It occurred to me as a chain of misleading words from the very early on, but as if the repeated lies could become true, I thought may be I was wrong, and that you were dread serious about the whole thing. Hence, my acceptance!

In fact, I have fought a losing battle in that tough spot as to how I should or must go about it. I pondered over the issue over and again, and every time I did, only one thing occurred to me: I’m digging my own graveyard! Only had I been smart and decisive enough to take a ‘right’ course then, though, I wouldn’t be here right now penning down this painful and ugly truth of the fateful encounter with a girl in the name of LOVE!

P.S. Before any one of you draw a conclusion that I was away from this Blogger's World due to the aforementioned incident, I want to make it clear that the story was written last year and that I was away from here due to lack of time having to dedicate whole lot of time in my academic course-PgDE. 

Happy LOSAR (New Year)!

Today, it is all about the day of festivity for the Bhutanese people like our Chinese counterparts. After all, it is our New Year! The day coincides with the first day of first month of the Bhutanese Calendar.  Normally, it is the day where family gets unified, relatives and friends get together over a lavishly prepared dishes or a cup of Ara, locally brewed alcohol and Bangchang, the fermented rice/corn juice(?).

Like every one of you would have something to do on the eve of the day, I for one have a very simply thing. I send out text messages to wish all the contacts that I have saved in my cell phone. This time too, I sent out to nearly 150 people, and about 73 replied to my sms. The most enjoyable part is, of course going through all the texts one by one. Each one of them carries a certain messages to convey about the day, not to mention about their comedic nature.

This year’s out going text message was as follows:

“Its time to celebrate, enjoy, and above all reflect on your bygone years! Losar has come and gone for the time immemorial, and the most impt thing is to appreciate your life and commit to give the best in the years that follow. LOSAR Tashi Delek!! Pema”

And here is the compilation of the text messages that I got from my friends!

“Woo! A glass of ara, a glass of spy, a glass of coffee, lets chase 4 losar wid shakam n red rice. Enjoy it. So wish u a very happy losar.”

“Happy losar 2 u too. Sorry for da late reply. Anyways hope u had a wonderful start of da losap.”

“Same to you la.”

“May god sparkle ur lif wit lightin of crackers n fil ur lif wit joy n hapinss on de occasin of 2days losar. Wishing u a vry HAPY LOSAR Wai! N ya. Lagpu ane zai!”

“Thx n same to u as well”

“Thanks pema sir, I also wishes you and you family a same feelings and truth you shared to me. Let me celebrate this losar for the successful year before, with less unfortune that we had. Enjoy the day. With regards…”

“Thanks same to you”

“Yes sir!!! :-) thank you n I sincerely hope that with all blessings from new 2012, n best wishes from all well wishers, you could be able to proced further with your utmost goal la. May the luck kiss your fate, n may the sky b the limit of your success la. Happy LOSAR la!!”

“Thanks khotkin enjoy the day tomarrow”

“Thkr pema n sam 2 u. Enjoy n ve fun la”

“Hapi losar…njoy..Suga drmz”

“Thanks a lot. Make de day more memorable n enjoyable den ever…hav fun.”

“Thx bro…n same 2 u bro. Enjoy da day! Tashi delek!”

Some however didn’t even have any idea of who I am although we are from the same village. Turned out they didn’t have my number saved in their phones.

“Same to u la whoever u might be.reckon on ur past action n selected da gud ones n celebrate ur achievement n start new life with hopes, aspirations n dream to be meet in reality which will motivates next losar to be celebrate much much more better then today n obtain da 45’(degree graph here after.hapy losar, my fren or????”

“Thank u n same to u…U min pema jamtsho.?”

“So swt…its simple frm my side ‘hope u too wil enjoy d day…’ Thanks mae…dtnt ;)”

“Thank u n same wishes frm my side to one and all”

“hey same 2 u na…enjoy tey may”

"Thanks n same u”

“Wish you Happy New Year!! Dhaw Chu neypay losar lu tashi delek shu gay la!! Thanks ”

"whn d midnite bell rings 2nite, let it signify a realization of al thgs u wish 4, let signify a year of courage n blives..so vt dis I wish u a vry hapi “DAWA CHUNI PA LOSAR” njy d day..missing u..gudnite..”

“Thanks n tashi delek to u 2. Enjoy the day”

“Thx man dt wory m cuming down 2maro.so c u dr”

“Thanks a lot. Billions of smiles. Millions of hapines, thosands of suces, hundreds of prosperity , dozens of good health, tons of hopes, & 1 heart wishing u a very “HAPPY LOSAR” do njoy it. Missing u all”

“Thank.happy losar. Gdnit”

“Thank u so much!! It is pleasure for me to receive this beautiful n interesting sms….i too wish u a very enjoyable losar…Tashi Delak”

“Than q for u r wish n same 2 u. “happy loser””

“Thanks u so much n i 2 wish u a veri hapi losar. Njoy n haf fun. Gudnit n tkc”

“Wakep up with new hopes, dreams and expectations. May god bless you all with happiness. Happy Losar 2 u n ur family. Tashi Delek Yeh”

“Hi hope u doin gud there n me too. Anyway wishin u very fabulous chunipa losar to u n ur family. Happy losar buddy!!”

Thank you everybody for sparing the precious time in replying my text message. May God bless you all!

Note: Sorry for the spelling errors and grammatical mistakes!

What should I expect?

I've just taken the path which not many people like to take it. Even if they do take, it is definitely their last and final option! The unwanted one, in short.

Yes, I am talking about the teaching job. What else can it be, right? Most boring job, perhaps? Well, it differs and it depends on how you the takers take it as. But sadly, so far I haven't seen much takers of it (teaching job) as a 'noble job', as it is being routinely referred to.

Throughout the course of my journey to this stage, I have hardly met anyone who actually 'encourages' to join this profession or at least have something good to say about it other than the ones already in it either by virtue or by fate. Worse enough, some even go to the extent of saying too many bad things, and put off the flames of patience that some possess.

...to be cont'd...

Off to the World of Work!

Excited yet nervous, pumped up yet tiring and heated up yet so cold. So was the state in which I gradually made my way through to the 'Peak of Learning' just three days ago. It was my first time to be in Sherubtse (now my work place), in fact, first timer to this entire Dzongkhag-Tashigang.

Having started my journey from Deothang quite late, I was welcomed by the chilly and darkened valley of Kanglung around 7:30 PM. As we made our way through the College main gate, all that I had back in my mind was 'how to find the accommodation' since the earlier accepted owner had reverted his decision and now wanted just the female tenants! I respect his/her preferences, no objection whatsoever, I just wish he had pronounced that early for that would enable me to find another room!

After dropping all the stuff at Mr. Sonam Tobgay's (new assistant lecturer as well) house, went to Ms. Karma Yangzom's (new as well) house for dinner, and finally went to a Mathang's house (a distant relative) house at Kanglung HSS campus for calling off the day. We were three of us, my two older brothers and myself. Felt quite uneasy to pose them a burden of accommodating all three of us, but had no options!

Early morning, after having a breakfast, we drove back to the College to report to the Director's office and to do some follow-ups. Having dropped me at the campus, my brothers made their way back to their destinations (Deothang and beyond). I felt quite sad as I bade farewell to my lovely and caring brothers. I choked quietly!

Next we were sort of escorted to the then unfamiliar buildings and offices by a senior lecturer. Firstly into the Administrator's office for the appointment, secondly to the Directors office for the briefing, thirdly to the Deans' offices and finally to the respective Department Head's office. In particular, the pain that Academic Dean took in orienting and introducing each one of us to the rest of the lecturers and staffs were very helpful and heartening! Thanks Madam Sonam!

As a final call, we were in the respective HOD's office, Department of IT/Maths in my case. Madam Sonam Wangmo looked so energetic and keen on orienting two of us (both for Maths) from the very beginning. Felt very comfortable! Despite the space crunch, she managed to find us a space at senior lecturers offices. That being done, we were briefed on the systems, and our task for the rest of the semester. Not surprisingly, she didn't assign any course to teach (since the semester is almost ending), rather required us to attain few classes "just to know how the senior lecturers conduct the classes..." Accordingly, we chose eight classes (totaling 8 hours) in a week to keep us engaged.

Frankly speaking, going to the classes ranging of 40-60 students for the first time was the most nerve-wrecking experience! Not to mention that most of the students look older than us making it difficult to differentiate between lecturers and students.

"That will do it for this semester, but be prepared to take the full module next semester," we've been reminded!

National Graduate Orientation Program 2011 (NGOP) in Session

Yesterday corresponding to the 10^th August 2011, some 1700 national graduates flocked into the Nazhoen Pelri auditorium, Thimphu. The briefing session that was scheduled to start at 9 AM couldn’t do so until much later as some of the graduates didn’t report on time and those who were on time didn’t take the seat properly. The committee members’ nightmare in maintaining the crowd was just too obvious.

With much hurdle, the graduates were accommodated into the packed hall and the session finally kicked off. The newly appointed secretary to the Ministry of Labor and Human Resources Dasho Pema Wangda gave an opening statement in Dzongkha, followed in English. “That’s the formality,” said he switching his speech to English. While we talk about diminishing usage of the national Dzongkha, and see the helpless state of Dzongkha Development Commission, I couldn’t help wondering how we couldn’t even conduct the ‘National’ session in our ‘national language’!

He clearly detailed down the main objectives of the NGOP session, while reminding each one of us to ‘derive the highest benefits’ from this program. He said that the online forums have seen disfavor in conducting such program, and that ‘given a choice, we would gladly stop’, but it has been felt by the highest authority that such a program be continued! Hence, yet again the NGOP 2011 themed “Meeting to Lead: Connecting our young Leaders”. 

...to be cont'd

Back to Blogger's World!

Finally, I am back into Blogging after more than a month. I have been busy: firstly graduating, secondly journeying back to my country Bhutan, and thirdly trying to settle down.

The month of June was the craziest of all, having to undergo a major transition! I landed on June 18th, in the Saturday afternoon on our second landing attempts due to 'unfavorable weather' at Paro. Coming home after nearly four years was a strange yet happy feeling.

Now that I am back, I am presented with so many things to address and attend to. Doing so keeps me away from this blogging world, and whenever I find time, the lack of the Internet connectivity makes it impossible to come. Oh, how I miss the broadband connection that I had there, lol. Unless I find an employment as soon as possible (where I can use the services accorded by the employer), I won’t be able to update or post any new articles here that regularly, so bear with me if you care (by the way, I hope you do care, lol).

Having said that, I will be preparing for the forthcoming BCSC exams (Bhutan Civil Service Common Examinations) preliminary examinations, which is scheduled on August 28, 2011, so wish me loads and loads of luck my dear readers!