Conversation with a curious eye doctor!

My eyes have been bothering me even more lately, however I couldn’t go for checkup until today. I was recommended to wear glasses during my first eye exam in 2009, subsequently which I wore glasses. But as of late it seems to give me more problems than solutions to my already poor vision. I get terrible eye pain often leading to dizziness and headache. Despite sensing the deteriorating health of my eyes, I had been forced to put up with the same old glasses and continue to push my academic requirements first.

Now that I am officially done with the studies, first thing that I wanted to address is my eye problem. So today my Peruvian friend Bryan took me to the ‘Eyeglass World’ store for check up. I had an appointment at 3 pm with the doctor. At the counter, I was greeted by a lady receptionist and escorted to the doctor’s room after doing preliminary exams.

“Doctor will be here in a minute,” says she as she returns to the counter with a file. I nodded and took the seat right next to strange looking machines (equipments for eye exams).

Shortly after, the doctor walks in with his eyes fixed on the file he was carrying presumably the information that I provided.

“Hello, I am Dr. Stein. Nice to meet you!” He introduces and offers me a handshake.

“Hello Doctor, nice to meet you too!” I responded.

Seeing me wearing glasses already, he asks me if it was okay to “take a look”. I almost immediately took off and handed it to him. He leaves the room with my glasses and returns after a minute wiping the lenses with a piece of cloth.

“Why are you here for today?” And he continues, “You already have glasses. Do you have other problem?”

“I got this glasses in 2009, so I am assuming it’s a time to change. Moreover I am getting terrible eye pain and headache.”

He nods as he assembles the equipments and places on me. As usual he makes me look through the lens and instructs me to read the letters displayed on the board attached to wall.

“Where are you from?” He asks me while he writes down the exam results.

“Bhutan” I replied. Seeing his confused look I added, “It’s a very tiny country between Indian and China”.

As expected he scratches his head with his right hand, mumbles and finally says, “Then this could be Tibet?”

“No, it is not, but we are neighbors,” I fired back.

He nods and cleans the lenses simultaneously, after which he directs me to look through the lens and tell him “which one looks clearer”.

“Look, what I am curious about is that why Tibet is under China now.” He continues, “Do you think Tibet was a part of China ever? Is that why China took it over?”

Not knowing how to answer that question given a very little idea about the Tibetan history or Chinese for that matter, I simply said “Well, I might be kinda biased with what I am saying, but personally I feel like Tibet should be independent because from what I heard Tibet was an independent country ruled by a dharma king for ages!” Of course, deep inside, I knew I had no concrete backings whatsoever to what I have just said. But he will not simply take what I just said; instead seem to have triggered him more.

“So your country has Buddha Monks?” he asks me.

“Yeah, it’s a predominantly Buddhist kingdom.”

“Oh Tibet is also Buddhist country, isn’t it? There are so many Buddhist monks!” He says as he scribbles down something on a yellow paper.

“Yes that’s true,” I supported him.

“But why all of a sudden Chinese decided to kill those monks and take over the country? What did those monks do that Chinese didn’t like?” He quizzes me as If I am a political analyst or historian.

“Honestly, I don’t know! But still today the monks are being tortured and killed by the Chinese government every year as per the news,” I answered him in concerned tone.

“I know right,” he agrees with me. “You are just next to Tibet, and you still don’t know anything about that?”

I felt so ashamed! Luckily there were only two of us in his room. At first I didn’t know how to tackle that, but soon I recomposed myself.

“I guess all those problems happened in 50’s, so its hard for me to know!” signaling that I was born much later in case he has doubted me for a 60 or 70 year man (lol). But as it turns out, that was not his concern at all.

“Yes it has happened in 50’s, but not that long to be forgotten!” Of course he is right. “Does Bhutan have a good relationship with China?”

“I think so, kind of.”

“Your country being just next to China, aren’t you not worried about China doing just like what they did to Tibet? If they could do to Tibet and get away with it, do you think they would worry about doing to any other countries?” He sounded genuine.

I saw myself dump founded for a moment with that question.

“I hope they don’t do! Of course other countries are not to be fully trusted either, just like how they react to the Tibetan’s endless pleas. They don’t want to mess up with China given its economic super power, so they don’t dare bring up the issue with Chinese government whatsoever even if they support Tibetan!”

With that conversation my eye exam has come to an end. He tells me to wait at the counter while the receptionist checks me out.

“That will be thirty-nine ninety-nine ($39.99), how would you like to make a payment?” says a lady staring at me behind a Dell computer.

“Okay, by debit!” I handed her my Bank of America card.

I still don’t know if my eyes are healthy, but that conversation keeps striking me even now. I think he is right in every sense and we should be indeed worried about our country. Several national new papers have been reporting about dispute over border demarcation, which is yet to be settled between Bhutan and China, so hope the two governments will settle it with mutual respect and truer wisdom!

P.S. This was written yesterday but couldn't post until today!

A Lonely Journey to the US (Part I)

It was 5 AM when I woke to a chilly weather of Zilukha hill, Thimphu, Bhutan on October 7, 2007. I was bound for New Delhi and beyond to the US for studies. My flight from Paro International Airport, the only airport in the kingdom of Bhutan yet, was at 10:00 AM. I could hear Anna (sister) Karma already in the kitchen preparing breakfast and doing the dishes as I tried to ‘wipe’ off my sleep. I stepped off the bed slowly without disrupting Ata Sangay who was slept just next to me. He had come the other day all the way from the border town of Phuntsholing taking a day off to reach me till Paro.

After I took a brief shower, I woke him and let him in to the shower. Anna Karma had already prepared the breakfast of rice, pork curry with several other side dishes.

“Khochung (“Uncle”; she calls me like her daughter would call me as), eat well now. You may not feel well in the plane otherwise,” says my sister handing me a plateful of rice. I could already feel my poor early morning appetite, so I made her reduce the load and settled with the half of it.

Countless thoughts ran into my mind as I sat on the couch waiting for everybody to get ready: how will I travel myself, how does Paro valley look like (I had never been to Paro until that fateful day!), what if I get lost at Delhi Airport, how will I stay with new people…so on and so forth. As I pondered over those thoughts, Ata Sangay had already started journey with my huge black luggage bag on his shoulder, soon Anna Karma and Baby (niece Karma Lhazin Tshering) followed. All three of them were accompanying me till Paro Airport. Finally I pulled my handbag containing travel documents, and shook hands with Khotkin Nima as I bade farewell to him.

Stepping down the staircases from the third floor I felt very cold and sad!

“A lonely journey had just begun,” I thought.

For the last time, I dialed to my girl friend who was then studying in Nima Higher Secondarly School and residing in Langjophakha, a valley overseeing the majestic 17^th century fortress known as Tashichhodzong, which houses the throne room of the King of Bhutan, the main secretariat, and summer resident of HH Je Khenpo (the Chief Abbot) and central monastic body.

I listened to the ring tone of my Nokia phone (my first phone, a gift from Ata Sangay for passing class 12 successfully) as it connected to my girl friend’s phone.

After a few rings, she picked up “Hello!”

“Hello Sonam?! I’m leaving…stay well!” I tried controlling my emotion.

“Aii! Safe journey my dear. Please don’t cry!” I didn’t know I was silently crying over the phone until she said not to.

“Yaya (okay), bye!” I hung up the phone seeing my Ata, Anna and Baby already waiting in ‘our car’-a yellow topped and white bodied Maruti Taxi.


...to be cont'd


P.S. I have just started compiling my journals, so please leave your comments and necessary corrections below. Thanks!

Finally Graduated!!

Shaking hands with the President Dr. Anthony J. Catanese

It’s been a long journey, both bumpy and smooth, but eventually I made it through

My alarm began to beep rather obnoxiously; it was 7 AM, Saturday morning of May 7, 2011-the commence day! I had to be 'checked in by 8:30 AM' according to the email received earlier the other day. In about 40 minutes later, I and my roommate (a grad student from Thailand) got checked in, and headed to the waiting room before we proceeded to the actual commencement hall. "What is your department and your last name?" stared a lady seated next to a bunch of files and ropes.  "Mathematical Sciences, Wangdi" I replied trying to spot my name on the check sheet. "Cum Laude!" says the lady handing me a little more than a meter long white-rope, "678 is your seat number". I didn't know what that rope was until a Chinese friend said "oh thats an award, congrats!" 

Moments later, I was in the waiting room flocked by soon-gonna-be graduates exchanging words and snapping pictures. I scanned through the neatly arranged rows of chairs looking for my seat and finally found my seat-at the very back (second last row). I greeted a very good friend of mine who was already seated a seat away from mine. Gradually more and more students in gown poured in and the hall packed. While some shy people like me remained quiet and silent, some seemed to have moment of their lives shouting and screaming at the top of their voice. A little overweight dirty blonde haired guy who was seated right behind me was the most vocal or outspoken. "Surprisingly, I am gonna miss you guys!" says he to his friends as a matter-of-factly and continues “Probably I am never gonna see you guys again!” An excited looking girl replies “I didn’t really like you guys that much, but surprisingly I think I am gonna miss you guys too!” A few laughs ensued.

In a meanwhile, a lady stepped on the podium and began to say something. I say ‘something’ because like many others who were seated at the back row, I couldn’t catch anything that she spoke. I could only hear someone shouting “Can you say that again?” or “What did you just say?” from the back.

The wait was so long that I already began to feel bored. My back began to pain, and at the left, I noticed my friend stuck in the same condition; her look conveyed it all. The situation couldn’t get any worse- sitting next to a smoker and putting up with his smoke-breath was awful. I am not being dramatic, but I felt dizzy seriously. My cheap Armitron watch registered the time as “10:00 AM” when we finally made a move in line: PhD candidates up in the front followed by Masters and Bachelors students. The sight of the train of graduates making their way into the commencement hall in line was so spectacular that I attempted to catch a shot when I suddenly heard a female voice “Hey, hey!” Disturbed, I looked back to find a red-haired girl smiling “Your shoes are very interesting-looking!” Not knowing if that was meant to be good or bad, I simply replied “Oh thanks!” without disrupting the move. On the way leading to the hall, we were greeted by professors and well wishers lined up along the path.

At 10:30 AM, we were in the hall seated on our respective seats surrounded by hundreds of people-someone’s family members, parents, friends, grand children, and kids. Shortly after the US anthem was sung, numerous speakers took their turn to the podium. One of the speakers, our university President Dr. Catanese informed the gathering “…today 1107 graduates are graduating in various fields…” and he went on to say some good things about university for the next thirty or so minutes. I didn’t have much complaint about him whatsoever, but the next speaker whom I didn’t even bother to check the identity bored everybody to death. His speech was not only long but ridiculously boring full of political issues. He even declared that “Obama is the smartest President ever to be seen…” crediting for cracking Osama Bin Laden! At one point I even wondered if he was campaigning for President Obama already. If it weren’t for a girl next to me who kept screaming, I would have dosed off into a deep slumber!

Of course, however, about an hour later his speech came to an end much to the relief of both graduates and audience! “FINALLY!” someone screamed from the crowd, sarcastically with the mixed of applauses. One by one the graduates were called on the stage, ‘Dr.’ title conferred to PhD candidates and others awarded the certificate. And the awardees made their way back to their respective seat. Unlike fellow graduates who had flocks of friends and family cheering and shouting their names when they were called on the stage, when my name was called, a complete silence ensued as expected! Sad! No ‘special person’ (as my friends like it to be put) for my graduation! How sad! Stepping on to the stage overlooked by thousands of people was both nerve-racking and exciting. “Great job!” the President, attired in a thick red gown and round black cap, congratulated me! On the way back I was made to pose several times and moments later I arrived back to my seat as a GRADUATE!

First ever trophy in my life!

"For the valuable contribution you have made! "

It is not the size of the trophy but the moment of it being awarded that matters

It took me these many years-16 years- to get a trophy! May be I have been around too many years that now they felt the need to give me one, probably? (lol) No, seriously I have not been recognized with any sort of trophies for contributing my hours to social activities until today. This marks the beginning, and hope it doesn't stop here! 


I did, however, have received a dozen or so of certificates for academic excellence since the second grade till I graduated from high school (12th standard). Sorry it sounds kind of showy; I can't help it (lol). But before you jump into a false conclusion that I am a "study freak", let me tell you I have engaged in co-curicular activities during my schooling days as much as I have engaged in studies. The only problem(?) though was I haven't won any awards or recognitions. May be they didn't really have such norm of awarding, or I would guess because in our schools, they expect us to contribute our time on activities no matter what. So it came to us as a form of daily routine job which we are expected to engage in- non deserving of an award/recognition so to say. 


But once we are in the university the things change, and everything in life takes a different turn-a turn that could lead you to a brighter side or to a darker side of the world. Particularly when you are in a big university, you are at lost; you don't know what is happening at the other side of the campus unless you explore and step out of your comfort zone. It took me a while to convince myself to get out of my cocoon, and get the feel of the society at large. I am still dealing with this problem (the problem of getting into the crowd), but I am relatively better now than I was a couple of years back. I have been trying to attend all the events that are organized on campus as well as off campus. Doing so presented me with a bunch of opportunities; opportunity to meet more friends, opportunity to gain self confidence, opportunity to share your own feelings, so and so forth. 


As the time passed by, I came into a close affiliation with the International Students and Scholars Services (International Student and Scholars Organization), and accordingly engaged in many activities that they organized. Now in the final semester of my four year degree course, I have become one of the most familiar faces to many friends on the campus. That in itself is a huge accomplishment given the fact that I am the only Bhutanese student on the brink of graduation in this university. Even more so, calling up front and getting recognized for the services that I have "rendered so far" is so inspiring and fulfilling in every aspects. Today coinciding with the End Semester Potluck Dinner, the Director of International Students and Scholars Services awarded me a "Rising Star Award" of the year 2010-2011. 


My special thanks to Ms. Shweta Patil, the President of ISSO, and a very good friend of mine for her support and encouragement!


Thank you so much ISSO! Go FIT!!


Note: Apart from a misspelt last name, the trophy was in fact quite nice!


Heres a collective picture. 

Do the best you could, there's always someone seeing it!

Just yesterday I have been recognized and awarded appreciation bronze certificate for Campus service hour and Community service hour! 


I feel highly honored!!

Driving through rough roads!

This week has been the toughest week in many years. Of course, final semester weeks aren't going to be that easy which I know quite well, but never expected to be that bad!

The undergraduate research (aka senior year research or senior design) was the culprit who took away every bits of my life. Just last Thursday, my research advisor Dr. Tenali, sent me an email about the research presentation which is to be held on the coming April fools day, and the poster was due today at 4pm. It was just a week's time frame to develop the poster, and necessary details. It was just not enough a time given the fact that I have other academic requirements to meet with six courses under my belt for this semester!

I ran to his office countless times by now, and I am already feeling pretty tired of seeing him (lol). All he does is give me the paper, and leave everything for me to figure out, which I did to the best of my ability. However when I get stuck, he is of very help to me. He was totally helpless with the very problem that made me sick. When it comes to coding, he is of absolute helpless. He knows very little about coding, and none of us know how to get the graph that is very crucial for the poster. I ran into his office only to get a few useless words, and whole thing left entirely for me.

With the little knowledge that I have, I wrote a matlab code, spend whole night on it-debugging-only to fail miserably. I sought some friends' help, but who cares about other's work? They weren't showing any signs of urgency despite my repeated requests. A couple of friends did, however, spare their leisure time on helping me, but at the end I was still with the same old problem-without a graph. I have never felt the time flying away that quick; it wasn't cooperating with me at all. While I waited for somebody to look on the code that I wrote, I worked on the abstract and the poster slide. The worse is yet to come. As the night falls, I left the college campus for my apartment to continue with it. Riding a bike alone at night is not a good thing over here with so many crazy people around ready to pounce on you anytime! There was just no time to cook fresh food, so had to gobble up the mirowaved-leftovers. Back in my room, I opened the Microsoft powerpoint to edit the slide that I left half done. How wonderful, the powerpoint kept crashing!! Only option I was left with was to ask my roommate to drop to the college campus, but he was not at home. My stress level rose thousand folds, literally! Everything just seemed against me at that moment. With no other options left at my disposal, I slept around 2 am after sending an email to my advisor.

Early in the morning, I was yet again accompanied with a soar throat coupled with a terrible headache! After a quick shower, drank a cup of hot water and off I left to school. Nothing seemed to be favoring me, I almost got hit by a car at the busy intersection! My heart froze for a moment! Had to move on though. I worked on with the poster slide and after confirming that I wouldn't be able to get the graph, I shot an email to the advisor about the problem. At least I got a little breather when I saw his reply "OK. Pema, its absolutely impossible to get the graph now, just include the theoretical part, and send it to me..." Thank God!

As much as I feel defeated about not getting the graph, I have had enough of this drama. I just want to get it done. So I sent my first draft and he was to send me the feedback as soon as possible. The time was running out, but his feedback was non-coming. I felt so dejected, frustrated, and stressed out to say the least!

Finally I caught him at his office for a few minutes, he suggested a few changes and told me to add some more. "And come back to my office". Just a couple hours left, and his office door was locked. I waited and waited at the hallway leading to his office for more than an hour. I am pretty sure some other students and professors might have thought I lived at that hall way after seeing me repeatedly since last week. In fact a professor whom I took a class in my sophomore year asked "You still here, have a big big exam coming up?" I smiled (such a hard job to break a smile in such moment) at him and said I was waiting to see my advisor. Lately as if to say that I wasn't having enough problems, my tooth which I couldn't afford to get a root canal due to heavy expenses started to bother me. It gave me a terrible pain! I almost broke down at that moment, but had to stand still, act manly and look for the brighter side although I saw none!

Finally he pops out from the door down the hallway, and gestures me to come to his office. I followed him wearing a fake smile. He looked at my slide, and instructed me to 'submit'! Sigh! Yes, I was waiting for that word-"summit"! Finally finally, I could get rid of this stupid shit!

Thank god, I survived!

A Little Gesture of Your's Means a Lot To Others

Funny enough, we had a plan like any other students for the spring break. I did bounce back and forth from the plans though; initially I was set to go for camping to Daytona with Indian and Caribbean friends, but had to withdraw due to the time conflicts and finally planned to go to Atlanta with Japanese and Korean friends. We were highly looking forward to it.


With those plans in my mind, a kind of incentive, I kept working my butt off to complete the assigned projects and homework before leaving for Atlanta. We were supposed to take off on Wednesday, the 9th of March, 2011. After submitting my assignment (with incorrect results!), I enquired the team coordinator (the Japanese guy) about our trip. What I received for a reply though left me in a complete surprise.


"It is canceled! Didn't Sena  (the korean guy) tell you about this?" And he continues, "Sorry for that!"


Sensing something strange about the whole thing, I replied "No its fine! What happened exactly?" At the same time I was worried that I might be the reason for the cancelation-for failing to contact them on time. However the reason that came forward was something I didn't even doubted.


"Sena says his leg is broken! Thought he told you".


Now I know why he had not replied to my earlier text messages; he was hospitalized! I thought of calling him immediately, but it was too late and I didn't want to wake him up. So  I assured the Japanese guy that I would call Sena the next day, and that I would go see him.


The next day I called him around 4 pm after getting back from the beach. He sounded exhausted! "I broke my legs!!!" was all he was saying. I promptly asked my Thai friend to accompany me. We cooked some noodles, boiled some eggs, and off we left to the college campus where Sena resides. We spent a few hours with him in his room, and left. The next day I went to see him again with some fruits that I bought from Wal-Mart the previous night. I could see how thankful he was for my little gesture.


"If you are not here, there is no one to bother about me and look after me. Thank you so much Pema!'' I only wish I could do more!


What I bumped into in Facebook was even more genuine. His girl friend has personally written to me all the way from Japan to thank me!

Sayuri Yamada March 10 at 7:22am Report

hi Pema! nice to meet you! im sayuri and sena's gril friend. i wanna say thank u to u! really thank u for taking care of him!! :D

Annual International Festival

A Belly Dance!

Today happens to be the annual international festival day, held on the campus of Florida Institute of Technology. Although the festival didn't kick start until noon, by default of being a member of International Student and Scholars Organization (ISSO) I had to be there since 8:45 AM to help put up the flags of the various countries.


The festival featured numerous songs and dances performed to  hundreds of people gathered at the college Pantherium surrounded by about a dozen booths representing various countries, organizations, and fraternities. The weather was so pleasant and the sight of fifty or so different flags flattering to the gentle force of the afternoon Melbourne breeze was nothing short of a spectacular. The audience which comprised of students, faculty and their family members, and people of the locality were treated to various songs, and dances notable of which was Indian dance performed by two young girls. As always the dance drew a huge crowd and if the applause they received is anything to go by, it really was something special which everybody was dying to see. Good job ISA (Indian Student Association)!!

People enjoying the show!

Despite my tight schedule (with a couple of mid term exams up for coming week, and few more assignments in line!), I spent whole day walking around and taking pictures with my recently procured Cannon camera. It was a good experience. Only complain I have about it is that once you have your own camera, its hard to take your own picture. You end up taking pictures of other, and at the end of the day you have just few pictures of your own. Well, anyway, I think I didn't waste my time that terribly-at least I got to meet some new people, and learn new culture. After all, every day and moment is now becoming to be my last and final ones, since this is my final semester. I barely have three months before I am headed back to my homeland-Bhutan in May or June.


For now, I gotta get back to business-studies!


Cheers International Festival!!!!